Daddy, we need You.
Our police departments are broken. Our law enforcement agencies are broken. Our judicial system is broken. Our prison system is broken. Our country is broken. Our people are broken… Our capacity for empathy is broken. Our willingness to listen and understand is broken. Our humility is broken. Our pride blinds us, our fear of being wrong suffocates us, our ignorance stifles us, and our complacency is killing us. Where is our humanity? Where is our humility? Where is our love? Where is our respect for human life? Another name added to the list of people whose country has turned its back on the people who broke their backs to build it. The list is too long. There are too many hashtags.
I realized I’ve been waiting for this. Since Freddie Gray, I’ve been waiting for this. Who will be next? It was only a matter of time. I’ve been angry, sad, disgusted, outraged, and every time, after I’ve exhausted every emotion, I fall to my knees and weep. I weep for every mother who has buried a child, I weep for every child who has buried a parent, I weep for every human being – no different than I except for varying levels of melanin in their skin. A variation in melanin intended by its Creator to be a work of art. A variation that we’ve turned into a means to demonize anything that is different from ourselves, as if appreciating the beauty in someone else somehow subtracts from our own. A variation in melanin that dictates everything from access to opportunity to how we are perceived by people who do not know our character but choose to judge us in ways they wouldn’t dream of being judged. I weep for each and every one of them. Humans. People. Brothers. Sisters. Mothers. Fathers. Friends. I weep for the feeling and thoughts they must have had in their last breaths – fear mixed with peaceful acceptance of their fate. “So this is what is to become of me. I’ve watched it happen to countless others, now it is my turn.” I fall to my knees and weep. And every time I ask God, “Why?”
Why do so many people who look like me have such a hard time seeing the truth? Why aren’t more people who look like me shaking in rage? Why can’t more people who look like me accept that there can be good people wrapped up in a bad institution? Why can’t more people who look like me acknowledge that one can identify a problem without assuming that he will be blamed for it? Why don’t more people who look like me seek to understand before being understood? Why don’t more people who look like me accept that history runs deep, and if we tell the broken-hearted that for every year spent with a lover it will take 2 to heal, it is foolish to expect 300 year old wounds to be forgotten in half the time? Why can’t more people who look like me be appalled at slavery, injustice, Jim Crow and his son the Prison Industrial Complex, without thinking it means they’re taking responsibility for it? Why don’t more people choose self-reflection? Why are we so fearful of change? Why do so many leaders choose pride over principle?
And every time I ask Him Why, He reminds me that asking Why is not my place and asking Why will not solve injustice. Asking Why will not bring anyone back from the grave & asking Why will not fix a broken system that was never intended to be fixed. The answer to Why is because we live in a fallen world full of fallen people. Bernie Sanders can’t fix it. Hillary can’t fix it. Chris Christie can’t fix it. Obama couldn’t fix it. Vibes and crystals and karma can’t fix it. Our obsession with self love and slacktivism can’t fix it. Only Jesus can fix it. He is crying for His children to return to Him.
The problem is always sin. The answer is always Him.